Wednesday, July 13, 2016

How To Keep the Spark In A Relationship Alive?

Come to think of it, a few months back a friend of mine came to me for an honest opinion. Well, knowing them and myself pretty well, tidak lain tidak bukan mesti nak cakap pasal relationship. I’m not an expert, at all lah, but I always wonder why these people will always come to me for this. Hermmm. Had a thought to write about this because last Monday I myself stumbled on some random posts related to this and diri sendiri sekarang macam kinda trapped with the same thing, kot. Ehhh ngantuk pulekkk.

Well to cut it short, he was confused about the relationship he was in (or if jodoh masih panjang till now I dont know, im that type who has no interest at all pasal relationship orang hahaha (T.T) but if they come to me mintak pendapat it is a definitely yes I would always be there pinjamkan telinga mendengar dan bagi pendapat).

After almost a year in an amazing relationship he found something was off. Could it be between the two love birds or he was under emotional hormones for not getting the affection he wanted from the other half itu yang buat dia tertanya.

The spark is not there anymore, Izz’ he claimed.

True. Things like this do happen. You will find hiccups here and there when you are in a relationship. Bila cakap tentang relationship everyone will go ‘Alah, kacang je!’, ‘Banyak lagi benda yang penting nak fikir daripada pasal benda ni’ or simply ‘Relationship ni nothing lah, kalau ada, adalah, kalau xde ok jehhh.’

Boy, they are wrong.

For some, yes, relationship and the issues gaduh here and there that come with it are petty. Like takde hal lah. Sorry to say this, but for those who think relationship lightly I would say ‘OK’ je. But for those who take it seriously like me, it is no joke.

I dont simply fall in love with anyone. Yes I’ve had a lot (literally) of failed relationships along the way in my extra baggage. For whatever happened before I just took it for something I gotta learn.

Bila tentang relationship ni jangan harap nak jalan atas kelopak bungar mawar sentiasa, sebab ada masanya u will definitely get scratched dengan duri-duri liar. Lagilah jangan berangan macam kau mampu lari-lari dekat tasik bak Shah Rukh Khan dengan Kajol dalam Dilwale. Walau cantik nak mati perempuan tu dalam filem tu haishhhh. Even diorang dalam cerita tu pun amek masak 15 TAHUN ye baru dapat bersama. So cerita dia if nak get in a relationship, get someone yang could bring the best out of you when you are together. Again, tengok mcm that particular on-screen couple Shah Rukh Khan and Kajol yang no doubt they are the most perfect and famous jodi in Bollywood. The chemistry between them is so real sampai fans of both celebrities imagine hubungan diorang macam dalam movie tu sama in real life.

So what if the spark between you and your partner luntur? How to keep the spark in a relationship alive? Daripada terus wandering around in the dark and overthink (gotcha! Overthinking is soooo me) why dont you keep your feet on the ground, stop walking meroyan macam orang gila dan fikir how to solve it?

When you know what the problem is it would be easier to start finding the solution. Make a plan even it is a rough one in your head, as long as you fikir how to do it. Then execute the plan. It is not harder than rocket science so chill lah.

And the only way yang best to handle this situation is to face your partner. Janganlah sekadar whatsapp or hantar text untuk discuss. Kau bukan Taylor Swift boleh sesenang mintak break dari Calvin Harris guna telefon! Percayalah bila duduk semuka baru boleh tau masalah dengan lebih jelas. Atau boleh detect orang tu tidak jujur atau apa-apa lah. Paling penting, jangan lari daripada masalah (except kalau tidak tahan sangat macam dia buat something behind your back by betraying your trust then gooooo run aku sanggup sorak untuk kau! Heh)

Sometimes antara sebab kenapa the spark pudar could be sebab jarak. Jarak itu memisahkan. But a little distance is okay to keep the spark alive but too much of it could kill it in any way possible. Always, always remember that.

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